Best Reason to Develop a Beer Gut

I happened upon something dangerous last night: ChurchKey. Tis true: Finally a casual-chic bar has opened on 14th Street that a) serves 50-plus somewhat-unusual drafts of beer (I only recognized about 10 of the names); b) has so much seating that even when swamped on a Monday night with 100 or so guests, most people still have a place to sit; c) offers some of the best bar service I’ve ever had in DC. Actually, she was one of the best servers I’ve had in this city, period.

What this means???  No more crowding and yelling over expensive wine at Cork or beer at Saint Ex. No more nights on back-breaking stools at Stoney’s. No more excuses for making the long-haul walk to Thai Tanic for dinner, because NOW there’s an amazing bar across the street to visit before and/or after.

Aside from the draft beer list, they have another 500 labels available in the bottle. Each beer is served in a specific glass “to perfectly tease out the nuances of each style on our list,” writes beer director, Greg Engert, on Churchkey’s blog. Sounds pretentious, I know, but somehow they’ve managed to mesh together passion, detail, intellect, and coolness, and create something that still feels down-to-earth.

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I had sips of four beers, absolutely falling in love with one: The Breakfast Stout (American Imperial Stout; $6.50). I wanted to sip it for hours—maybe because it smelled and tasted like chocolate coffee. Or maybe it was just because I just felt so gdmn cool sipping out of that bulbous snifter. Honorable mention goes to the seasonal pumpkin beer (Tsmisje Speciale with a whopping 10.5% alcohol; $8.50) and the German Pilsner (Hopfenkonig; $6.50) that our server promised would finish “round, not crisp.” And yes, it actually felt like our tongues were slipping over spheres as the beer made its way down. I left spellbound, in love with ChurchKey after our first date. Let’s hope things progress as beautifully as they have with Patten.